I miss my husband's voice. The most beautiful sound ever.
When he was in hospice, I bought a digital voice recorder, and we recorded several conversations. The sound of his voice still makes my heart skip a beat, but listening to those conversations breaks my heart. He was still here, but we both knew we were nearing the end, and we spoke about it so openly. He was so brave, so strong, so pragmatic. I cried through each conversation. I cry now when I listen to them.
Maybe someday they'll make me smile. Maybe someday they'll be happy reminders rather than such painful ones. Somehow I doubt it.
Those recordings are priceless. I'm so glad that I have them, but listening to them is sweet torture. I miss him so so very much.
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