Today was not an "anniversary day". It wasn't x months since y. It wasn't a birthday, or holiday, or celebration that made Brian's absence all the more painful - it was just a horribly bad day of sadness and tears. Today's memories did not bring smiles - they only heightened my pain. I know that Brian would have been disappointed in me today for not taking better care of myself, but sometimes the pain is too strong for me to fight off.
Brian, I miss you so much. I just ache. I love you.
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